stuffofstardust | Thread: KITT/Tabs

boom_queen posting in

Who: KITT and Tabs
When: Does it matter?
Where: Outside the school and then shots!
What: Hahahaha. So a mutant and a car walk into a bar...

This might have literally been the craziest thing Tabitha had ever done in her life.

The whole thing was bizarre and ludicrous and the fact that she believed that a wrong number had connected her to a sentient car made her wonder if she was completely lucid or not. But then she had to go and say "let's go do shots". Because if there was one thing Tabitha Jane Smith never turned down it was shots.

And now she was waiting down beyond the gates of the school where the asphalt met the dirt and grass, with the hood of her zip-up sweatshirt pulled up.

One did not dress up for shots. One expected that they were going to be so plastered by the end of the night that they were going to need their sweatshirt to wipe up someone's vomit.

Or something.

Either way, a series of misfired texts and ridiculous banter had led to this and she was half expecting some 50-year-old bald guy in a Saturn from the 90s to show up. Which was fine. Not exactly welcome. But fine. By the time she was done stuffing timebombs in his tailpipe he'd think twice before doing all this crazy talk again.

And if he actually was some sort of car turned android... well, shit, Tabby had seen a lot weirder.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

ki2k

"You sound very much like me, Tabby. Asking questions is how you learn." KITT was often told to shut up when he got to be too annoying with his questions or commentary.

"I have no idea. It's going to be an experiment. I certainly hope if I can get drunk, it won't be so excessive that I vomit." There was amusement in his voice now. "No, not anything like that. Plenty of hair, mid-twenties, thin as a rail. No basement dwellers for this AI, I promise. I rather look like my main technician. For all intents and purposes she could be considered my 'mother', so I think it's fitting."

And with that, he pulls up to the curb in front of the watering hole he's chosen. "I'll let you out here and I'll join you in a few minutes, all right?"

From:

boom_queen

"Why? Are you going to be all naked when you change shape?" she asks, raising and wiggling her eyebrows at... well, still the voice modulator.

Could he "see" her? That was another important question.

Either way, far be it from her to question a carborg's request. "I'll go get us drinks. Try not to freak out the locals with your magical shapeshifting stuff. They like to act like assholes when they see something they think is weird." Slipping out of the car, she headed into the bar, which was just the way she liked it. Dark, slightly dingy around the edges, and just a little bit smoky.

Once at the bar, she settled in and started ordering drinks since she had no idea what a cyborg would even like.

From:

ki2k

"Only the very first time." His voice is full of amusement now as he watches the expression on her face. He can see her just fine - onboard cameras make sure of that.

'Carborg'. If she ever calls him that he wouldn't object; it's pretty funny really.

"Thank you. I'll do my best. Now let me see, where is the nearest phone booth?" He's kidding, he's kidding, he's actually going to look for a quiet alley. As she says, he wouldn't want to be scaring the locals! Though being honest, despite appearances, he could more than likely take on an entire group of thugs with only minimal damage. Not that he'd want to find out!

Oh. The bar isn't quite as nice as he was expecting. He waves his hand in front of his face, shooing away the offending blast of smoke that hits him full-on. Once the smoke clears he spies Tabby sitting at the bar, with an array of drinks in front of her. Oh my. Nothing for it though, he offered to buy her drinks and from the looks of it, she is.

"Tabby?" He walks up and slides onto the bar stool next to her. "Do I need to introduce myself?" He's smiling, but his eyes are still a little wide at all the drinks.

From:

stealsallyourstuff

She hadn't been ignoring him when he'd said he'd buy. But Tabby's kind of a do shit and roll with it girl and once she got to the bar, she decided that the carborg was going to be shown a good time, with a lot of alcohol, if it killed her.

Anyway, she'd told the bartender someone else was picking up the tab.

She turns, mid-shot -- because getting started early wasn't unheard of for her -- and her eyes went wide. "Ho-lee shit, dude. That actually looks real." She's also not one for politeness or not doing things that are totally rude, so she reaches out to touch his (its?) face to see if whatever makes up the "skin" part actually feels real too.

From:

ki2k

Apparently! He hopes that having a good time won't come to that, any ill-timed or inconvenient deaths. That would be a definite buzzkill.

Maybe they should make taxi arrangements before they start drinking.

Especially since she's already started without him. He eyes the bartender almost apologetically. The guy's in for a long night.

"It is real." He tolerates her touch good-naturedly, because he understands her curiosity. "It's human skin. Human flesh, human blood. Human body, for the most part, with some electronics, wiring, hardware, and circuitry interspersed throughout. I'm sort of like a new-school Cylon, if you know what that is." He frowns for a moment. "I'm actually a lot like a new-school Cylon, come to think of it." At any rate, he's pretty sure he's a real boy.

From:

stealsallyourstuff

"Frakking Cylons." So sue her, sometimes, when she got bored, she had Syfy binges.

But boundaries aren't something Tabitha really concerns herself all that much with, so it's a good thing he doesn't take offense to the touch. Hopefully he's as good-natured when she opens her mouth and says something really inappropriate.

"So... like... do you have a working dick and shit?" Which she's apparently said louder than she intended, because a couple of other people at the bar turn to the look at her.

Oops.

From:

ki2k

"Right? I was rooting for the humans, personally." Programming was a hell of thing sometimes.

Annnnnnd. Hmmm. His eyes have gone wide, and he's looking at the people who are now watching them with a rising feeling of panic. He can feel his face burning as he tries to splutter out an answer.

"I. I. Um. I." Okay, Kitt. Close your mouth, gather your thoughts, try again. "I think so." Maybe the floor will open up and swallow him whole.

It doesn't.

Instead, he does the next best thing, grabbing one of the shots Tabby's got in front of her and downing it in one go, not even caring that it burns his throat and makes him cough after, it's better than dealing with the stares.

From:

stealsallyourstuff

"Oh, stop staring," she say to the people looking their way and waving her hands at them in annoyance. "It's like you've never seen a robot do shots before." Honestly, Tabitha is so rarely serious with anything says or does that she really doesn't give a damn what people around her think. Especially strangers.

But she's laughing at his reaction through all this. "You think so? Christ. Isn't that like the first thing you test out?"

Well. Maybe in her world. But normal people, and cyborgs, didn't tend to live in her world.

From:

ki2k

Kitt is forced to facepalm now, because Tabby is just so... blunt. Which he knew. But hasn't directly experienced until now. It was going to be an interesting evening. He offers up a weak smile for the people who are now only glancing at them, having been shamed into not staring anymore. He desperately wants to mouth about how she's kidding, but he doesn't want to attract their attention again.

Keeping his voice low, he shakes his head. "What? Of course not! It's not very dignified, is it? Besides, I've had other things to do." Like... replying to misfired text messages. And visiting museums. Normal things that normal people did, who didn't live in her world. He needs another drink. Thank goodness she has plenty. Maybe this time he'll taste it.

From:

stealsallyourstuff

Oh, yes, replying to misfired text messages was so dignified.

"Relax," she says, still laughing, and holding her hand up behind her to flip off the people who still have the balls to glance over at them. "Fuck 'em, right? They don't have enough going on in their own pitiful lives to not be interested in things that are none of their damn business."

The last, of course, is said louder. Public shaming at its best. Good job, Tabitha Smith.

She shoves a couple more shot glasses at him. "Don't be shy. If you don't drink it we won't be able to find out how drunk I can get you."

From:

ki2k

No, that was a matter of Kitt being a troll. For fun. It doesn't take dignity of any sort to be a troll.

"Of course. You're right. We'll never see them again either so it's all perfectly fine. Right?" He gives her a weak smile and notes that the floor still isn't opening up. Sigh.

He shoots another side-eyed glance her way but he does pick up one of the shots, studying it for a moment before downing it the same way he did the one before. There's more sputtering and coughing as it burns his insides out, but other than that he's completely fine. He's always wanted to see what it was like to be hollow and now he'll have the opportunity! "You're going to be drinking too, right? Or are you just going to be watching me get drunk?"